The journey of grief is our story. There is no destination, no resting place to reach, no final answer. There is simply the journey we take and the story we live with our feet, with our heart.
- From Sharing our Stories: A Hospice Whispers Grief Support Workbook
We cannot approach grief the same way we approach many of life’s other challenges. It is not something we get over. We are neurologically wired to forever give those we love a place in our hearts and minds. It is not something we let go of, fix or leave behind. It becomes part of our journey through life. A steady companion that connects us to everywhere we have already been and all the places we are yet to go.
We are inherently capable of living with and after loss. But as we seem to have lost and forgotten these innate skills as a society, when loss and grief come knocking, we are often left to meet them alone. Grief asks us to surrender. To trust that we can be drawn into the depths of our soul and resurface. But we cannot surrender and at the same time hold ourselves and hold the space to grieve. To truly let our grief in, we need others. We need held spaces. We need to grieve together so we can grieve alone.
Our approach to grief is one of presence and surrender. A slowing and letting go of any agenda to heal, overcome or transform. Trusting our grief to carry us down turbulent rivers and out into open waters again.
The foundation of all our work and offers
Presence
We recognise grief’s beckoning to be compassionately witnessed, seen, felt, heard and expressed rather than sought to be fixed, cured or moved on from. We seek to honour its invitation to be fully present with ourself, our body, our experience and with life itself in this very moment.
mind, body, soul
When we journey with grief, we journey with every aspect of our being. Our mind trying to understand a world that no longer seems to make sense. The pain in our body as it tries to reconfigure itself around the empty space we now carry. And our soul as it craves hope and connection as we take step after courageous step.
Slowing down
There’s a slowing that comes with great loss. Time shifts and warps as the world continues to move at a pace that seems to vastly exceed the gentle pace with which we now wander. We aim to provide a space that meets this tender slowing, a meandering pace away from the current of life’s river that rushes ever on.
acceptance
We don’t choose grief. It finds us, persistently demanding to be let in, carving out a space for itself in our hearts, our souls, our lives. If we can let it in, embrace it, accept that from now on forward it will be a steady companion in our lives, we can begin to journey with it, rather than spending our life trying to run from it.